Tuesday, January 21, 2014

American Horror Story: Coven Episode 11 1/15/14 By: Maxwell Kale

This episode of "American Horror Story: Coven" opens up with a flashback of Kathy Bates moving to New Orleans. Next, we see what any normal person does to christen their house by practicing the good ole ritual of enjoying chopping off a chicken’s head. After we see Kathy Bates quickly become bored of chickens and move on to the next logical step torturing hurt slaves. Looks like Kathy has a new hobby.

After this, we see a funeral for Nan and Queenie shows up with her new pet a white person. She walks in with Kathy Bates on a leash.Next we see that the witch hunters decide to pay the witches to get the feds off their back. Apparently being witch hunters doesn’t give them the power to say just kill the witches and get their money back. Heaven forbid. These bad guys aren’t really all the useful to the plot. Then we hear a rather long monologue of Kathy lamenting the fact that she no longer can enjoy the art of killing. Poor girl. While this is going on we see the head mistress finally realize she is useless even more so without powers and we see her gouge her eyes out. Maybe she finally just read the script.

Looks like its Kathy’s day! In walks a hurt black gardener and she quickly takes this gift from god to get back to her favorite hobby of being batshit. So as you guessed she ties him up and slashes him. Same old same old. Next we see Zoe do a spell in the bath rub to find out who killed Nan. She figures out it was Fiona and Angela Bassett. She then plans her revenge. After that we see Madison try to blow Kyle but he pushes her off because he loves Zoe. Madison angry that her mouth is empty uses her telekinesis to bitch slap Zoe on the head. Madison then claims she will tare them both apart and storms off all dramatic like. Next we see the Axe Murder trying to talk Fiona into giving up the coven and spending her last days as a farm wife. Imagine Fiona on a farm ha!

While Kathy is killing the Blackman in walks the ghost of Bently. He offers Kathy a miracle drug that can render Angela Bassett mortal. This drug is called , “Benadryl.” But first she has to go get him a really rare creepy doll for his collection. After we find out Queenie claims to have new powers that help her survive shooting herself in the head. Now that would only be useful if she were in a band called Nirvana. Next the whacky red head witch comes in and warns Zoe that she and her zombie boyfriend Kyle should run away before Madison moves on from bitch slapping to killing.
Finally the best scene of the show happens:

Angela Bassett and Fiona go to visit the witch hunters to see what they want. Fiona said she will only comply with their demands if she gets a mansion, private jet, and no more witch hunting for a century. Good thing the witch hunters quickly disagree because we then are treated to an epic scene of the Axe Murderer bashing everyone’s head in. After we see Kathy poison Angela with the benadryl which of course does nothing at all. Bentley comes and hits Angela on the head and she falls down the stairs. Turns out he just lied to Kathy just to get Angela out of the way. She still happens to be immortal.  Next we see Bentley dressed up in his usual creepy baby outfit taking care of the baby Angela needs to sacrifice to keep her immortality.

The show ends with Kyle and Zoe hopping onto a bus to escape this show without a well written plot.

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